Archive for the ‘Family/ kids and environments’ Category

When God said in Genesis 2:24, “A man will leave his father and mother, and be united to His wife”, (A man and woman will leave their father and mother and be united to each others), God spoke out in His wisdom, and there are countless of reasons living as a joint family can be bad for people, as well as many benefits of living as Genesis 2:24 said.

Usually in many Asian cultures we live together as a join family in one house, there might be some benefits, but the word of God and revelations are more plumbline even for a family. However, there can be many case people live together in one home even though it may not be the original blueprint God intended.

Benefits for women:

It is beneficial for women because they can express themselves, many women will be freed from mistreatments, many may feel oppressed or insecure living as a joint family, many women cannot make the type of meal they want to have, for countless and countless of families relationship problems often happen because of living as a joint families, which are very bad for their emotional health and bad for relationship with relatives.

Because it was not the way God intended to build families, it bring chaos. As one writer in social media wrote something like, “No two women can stay together in one kitchen”.

Benefits for children:

Freedom Genesis 2:24 is also beneficial for children, children need room to play, they need to have fun, they make home messy, dirty, they run around, they climb on the couch, they turn the televisions to cartoons or other kids channel, they want to play games in the computer, they spread their toys all around, they drop their milk, they spread their children books all around when they play, they spread their color pencil all around, and all those things are needed for children in the home, the home cannot always be neat and tidy if there are children. And for sure the Granny, uncle, aunty, or someone’s not gonna like the messy and dirt children make in the home.

Even for fathers and mothers many times it will need patience, one spilled milk, another pass urine in his pants and on the floor, and another make the home messy with his toys, that’s what children are, and they need to do that. Children need to play, need to have fun, they need to do all kinds of different things in different ages, and they will make the home dirty, messy, and make many mistakes, because they are children.

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All of these things which we think are small little things are the things that can bring arguments, gossips and fights in joint families. So, therefore it is also beneficial for children even after having children what the word of God said, “A man and woman will leave their families and unite to each others”.

– David Chawngthu

Be good to others

Posted: June 13, 2016 in Valuing others

It is important to be good to others, family members, our neighbors, friends, and everyone else.

The scripture said, “ ‘YOU SHALL LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL, AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND.’ “This is the great and foremost commandment. “The second is like it, ‘YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF.’ “ (Matt 22:37-39)

One of the purpose of writing this article is to show that God put much important in being good to others, the scripture said that it is the Greatest commandment to love God and our neighbors. So God put it very important.

The Lord blessed Laban because of Jacob:

We find that Jacob worked for his father in law Laban, and the Lord blessed Laban because of Jacob.

Laban said to Jacob, “If I have found favor in your eyes, please stay. I have learned by divination that the LORD has blessed me because of you.” He added, “Name your wages, and I will pay them.” Jacob said to him, “You know how I have worked for you and how your livestock has fared under my care. The little you had before I came has increased greatly, and the LORD has blessed you wherever I have been…” (Gen 30:27-30)

Supernatural transference of Laban’s wealth to Jacob:

Jacob’s father in law seems to be unfair to Jacob, cheating Jacob, and seems to be doing many clever deeds to him, however, God transferred Laban’s wealth and gave it to him. Laban was bad to Jacob, but God transferred his wealth and gave them to Jacob.

Jacob said to Rachel and Leah, “I see your father’s attitude, that it is not friendly toward me as formerly, but the God of my father has been with me. You know that I have served your father with all my strength. Yet your father has cheated me and changed my wages ten times; however, God did not allow him to hurt me. If he said, ‘The speckled shall be your wages,’ then all the flock brought forth speckled; and if he said, ‘The striped shall be your wages,’ then all the flock brought forth striped. So, God has taken away your father’s livestock and given them to me”. (Gen 31:5-9)

We don’t say that God will do it that way to us, however, this is a very interesting true story of a person who was not good to someone, a real life story, and how God transferred wealth and Jacob became exceedingly prosperous as the Bible said. Therefore, it is important that we love our neighbors, and love others and be good to others.

It is important for us that we don’t do cruel things to others, evil deeds and wicked deeds against others, mistreating others, cheating others, doing bad things against others, and that we have a clean heart toward others and if it depends on us, living at peace with everyone.

Be good to others

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The scripture said in Romans 12:18, “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone”.

– David Chawngthu

Low self image can hinder us from receiving from God. When we have a low self image, we feel we are not worthy, we can have a feelings of not worthy to receive, not worthy to have, not worthy to have good belongings, not worthy to be rich or wealthy. But when we know our Identities in Christ, we know we are a child of God, we are children of the King, we feel we are Prince and Princesses, we know we are loved and accepted, we know God wants to give us good gifts.

Jesus said in Matthew 7:11 – “If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give what is good to those who ask Him! (Matt 7:11)

From here we can say that, even wicked people and evil people love to give good gifts to their children. Our heavenly Father is a good God, full of love and compassion, who is generous and love to give good gifts to us.

Some years ago in 2008, me and my family were working in Youth with a Mission without any single salary, we need flight tickets, train tickets, taxi fares, staff fees, house rent, electric bills, other travelling expenses, need to buy household things for our new home where we will be shifting, and many more needs. In the midst of that we still need a laptop, I fasted one meal and asked God for a laptop, which I told only my wife, and then we were given a laptop in the same month, God provided us through my Grand Dad in the same month, he didn’t knew that I was praying to God for a laptop in that month, I was amazed, we were amazed.

If I feel unworthy to have a laptop in the midst of all that, then I wouldn’t asked God for a laptop when I need, but being a child of God, I believe that God wants to provide for us. Jesus said in Matt 7:7 – “Ask and it shall be given to you”.

God wants to provide us not only what we need, but in abundant and for our enjoyment. God wants us to enjoy life.

1 Timothy 6:17 says that “God is the one who richly provide us all things for our Enjoyment”.

low self image

When we have a low self image, not knowing that we are sons and daughters of the King of heaven and earth, we can feel that we are not worthy to receive good things, and it can hinder us from receiving from God, but the truth is that we are children of the King, highly precious and highly valuable to Him, Extremely loved, and He love to provide for us, that’s the truth.

– David Chawngthu

Many of us must have heard about the parable of the lost son, who took his share of estate from his father, squandered his wealth in wild living, spend all his wealth in wild living. However, many people, in some places most people must have not realized that the main focused and the main highlight of this story Jesus shared was the Father God, the Father heart of God was the main highlight and focus of this story.

Suppose you have a son or daughter, who took all his share of estate, enjoyed life and live a wild living, and then came back all broken. For most of us our respond would be, “What are you doing here?”, “Get out of here”, “Are you not even ashame to come back?”, “Who are you? I know you no more”, “I’ll beat you up”, “Don’t ever come back to this place”, “Get the hell out of here”, “You stupid fool”, “Good for nothing”, “You useless dude”.

Most of us would probably respond in those ways, however the Father here responds very differently in this parable then most of us would respond, because the Father here reflects the Father heart of God.

While he was a long way off, his Father was filled with compassion, he ran to his son, threw his arms around him.
It is important to know here that even before the son open up his mouth and has not shared anything to his Father, from far way off his Father was filled with compassion, ran to his son, and threw his arms around him.

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Then, the Father gave an order to put the best robe upon him, put a ring on his finger, and sandals on his feet, they also have a feast and celebrations.

From this Father we find the compassionate Father, the running Father, the forgiving Father, the hugging Father, the celebrating Father, the God who celebrate over us.

– David Chawngthu

We created this chart for you, it is taken from “Addicted Behavior Counselling School” (ABC) (Residential Training required) which is a 5-6 months course in the “University of the Nations” under an organization called “Youth with a Mission”.

To do that course, you first need to do “Discipleship Training School” (DTS) established all over the world, (Residential Training required) which is a 5 to 6 months course, and then “Biblical Counselling School” (Residential Training required) which is a 5 to 6 months course, and then you can do this training course if you want.

Anyway, even if you don’t do any of those trainings, this is very simple to know just by looking at this chart. Starting from the Soil of Addictions – Spiritual Abuses, Physical Abuses, Sexual Abuses, Emotional Abuses. And then comes the Roots of Addictions, and then to the Fruits of Addictions.

It is also important to know that there are many other different types of things that can be addicted beside what are written in the Tree of Addictions, however, these are some major stuffs that can be addicted.

It might be helpful for your family, school, orphanage homes, your community, centers and groups.

(Feel free to download the picture)

Addiction tree

ACTIVE AND PASSIVE ABUSES:

Both active and passive abuses can spoil your children.

ACTIVE ABUSES: Hitting, beating, slapping, kicking, bad words, screaming, etc.

PASSIVE ABUSES: Not listening to them, no affection, no provision, no concern, no care, no attentions, no friendship with them, not spending time with them, being too busy.

One example could be when Father and Mother got divorce, it could be part of children abuse for children, and is harmful for children, the pain and anger, the shame, and the loneliness, which are all roots of addictions. Another example could be when children are put in hostel or study camp and they always feel very homesick, that feeling of loneliness also create anger in them, and being away from parents for a long time could be harmful for children and can spoil children.

Abuses are the main roots for most spoiled children, verbal abuses, shutting their mouth, not want to listen to them, lack of concern, being too busy and no presence which may also be known as passive abuses, and other active abuses are the roots of wounded children and spoiled children.

Love your children, they have an emotional needs to spend much time with you. Spend time with them, play with them.

Different types of parenting:

There can be many different types of fathers, mothers, parents, and guardians, we need to be aware of some of the things that can spoil our children –

– Authoritarian parents,
– Too strict parents,
– Perfectionist parents,
– Absent parents,
– Competitive (comparing children with siblings and others, or pushing them too much),
– Far away parents,
– Abusive parents,
– Legalistic parents,
– Critical parents,
– Judgmental parents,

All these things can bring harm and wounds, and carry great amount of weight to spoil children. We need to see our children and other children as the Almighty God sees them, highly precious, highly valuable, deeply loved and concerned, and that’s simply wisdom.

Some emotional needs of children:

Below are some of the emotional needs of your children, in fact every human beings on earth need them, but more needed by children and young one’s –

– Attention (knowing what they doing, being interested in what they interested, playing games with them)
– Acceptance
– Respect
– Healthy Affections
– Friendship
– Your Presence
– Support
– Security
– Provision
– Approval
– Praise, praise, praise
– Appreciations
– Encouragement
– Comfort

– David Chawngthu

It was Dec 2013, my wife and I got separated, not only separated but got divorced, we were separated and divorced for over a year. It was somehow the darkest moment of our marriage life, we were already working in Ministries full time for 8 to 9 years at that moment, and it was because of our lack of knowledge that separations happen. I was faithful to her, she was faithful to me, we both were faithful to each others, but were just in a lack of knowledge about family and marriage life.

Hosea 4:6 said, “My people are destroyed from lack of knowledge”.
Proverbs 29:18 said, “Where there is no vision/ revelation, the people perish”.

But it was amazing and God was good to us, in spite of all our marriage situations at that moment, God gave me so much revelations about marriages and family, where it makes us want to be back together few months later, but it took us over a year to be actually be back together. And because of the revelations, the living word of God dwells inside our heart, gives us knowledge, bind us together with the word of truths dwelling in our hearts, it greatly builds our marriage life by those revelations from God. Not only that, even though it was our darkest moment of marriage life, God gave us revelations about marriages and families, and meant it to be a blessings to all marriages, families, and those who are in need.

THE THIEF (SATAN) COMES ONLY TO STEAL, KILL, AND DESTROY:

Separations and divorces are not of God, they are from the dark world, of the Devil, it’s one of the tool the Devil meant to destroy God’s beloved people, God never separate and divorce marriages, God never give us sicknesses, God never do harm to us, but the Devil does, because Jesus said, “The thief comes only to steal, kill, and destroy, I come that they may have life, abundant life”.

Romans 8:28 said, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose”.

It’s never God who separate and divorce marriages, it’s never God who let them happen, that’s the Devil’s work, but what the Devil meant for evil to harm us, hurt us, and to destroy us, God can twist them and turn them out into something good because He loves us so much.

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The Devil work to destroy us, but in turn God can do all things, even those revelations were not just for us, but God gave us to be a blessing for every marriages and all people who are in need of those revelations, God can twist them around and use them for the extension of His Kingdom.

You can check out our blog about “FOUNDATION ON MARRIAGE” @ https://representers.wordpress.com/category/family-kids-and-environments/foundation-on-marriage/

Some of the topic includes –

Being committed and loving one another – marriage..
FOUNDATION ON MARRIAGE: Part 1 (Couple’s Priorities)
FOUNDATION ON MARRIAGE: Part 2 (Divorce, Separation)
FOUNDATION ON MARRIAGE: Part 3 (Clinging close than anyone/anything, No separation)
Spending times as a couple, and with kids –
FREEDOM Genesis 2:24:
Marriage destroyed for lack of knowledge

– David Chawngthu

It is briefed that 15 times in the Old Testament Bible about Father, and 254 times in the New Testament Bible.

Positive speaking:

If you have practice hearing the voice of God in regularity personally, or if you have been in an environment where you shared together in regularity what God spoke to you, you will experience that most of the time He will speak very simple words to us and very positive, He will speak about how much He loves us, how precious we are to Him, how valuable we are to Him, how He sees us, how He is with us, how He treasure us, how we are the apple of His eyes, His encouragement, His comfort, His strengthening, His uplifting, His appreciations, His praise toward us, how He is proud of us as His son or daughter, all those things are the Heart of the Father God showing to us. through hearing the voice of God.

In the same way, it is important to speak positive things to our children to build healthy emotional health, healthy self image and healthy confident, you are handsome/ beautiful, you are so precious, God gave you to us, appreciations and praise.

Identities In Christ:

If you measure your value and your worth by anything rather than your “Identities in Christ”, either by the positions you hold, by the degrees you have, by the wealth you have, or by your looks, or any other kinds of outward things, you are probably having some kind of Insecurities inside yourself. You will need to know your “Identities in Christ” and meditate on them.

You are a beloved child of the most high God, highly valued and precious.

Knowing and experiencing

Respect, value:

The language that were often spoken to you in your childhood and as you grew up, either Spanish, French, Chinese, Hindi, or English will probably be the language you use in your Adulthood. In the same way, our childhood experiences can greatly affect our adulthood.

If you were treated with respect during your childhood and as you grew up, you are likely to respect children in your adulthood. If you were not respected, you are likely to disrespect children in your character. If you were often abused as a child you are likely to abuse other children in your adulthood. If you were valued as a child and as you grew up, you are likely to value other children.

Experiencing the love of the Father God:

Even if you were dishonored, unrespected, unvalued, feeling unworthy, feeling not precious as a child and as you grew up, knowing and experiencing the love of the Father God can change your character and make you respect and value other children, knowing and experiencing the love of the Father God will make you see children as precious and valuable.

You are a beloved child of the most high God, highly valued and precious.

– David Chawngthu