Active and Passive Abuses

Posted: January 8, 2016 in Family/ kids and environments


Both active and passive abuses can spoil your children.

ACTIVE ABUSES: Hitting, beating, slapping, kicking, bad words, screaming, etc.

PASSIVE ABUSES: Not listening to them, no affection, no provision, no concern, no care, no attentions, no friendship with them, not spending time with them, being too busy.

Abuses are the main roots for most spoiled children, verbal abuses, shutting their mouth, not want to listen to them, lack of concern, being too busy and no presence which may also be known as passive abuses, and other active abuses are the roots of wounded children and spoiled children.

Love your children, they have an emotional needs to spend much time with you. Spend time with them, play with them.

Different types of parenting:

There can be many different types of fathers, mothers, parents, and guardians, we need to be aware of some of the things that can spoil our children –

– Authoritarian parents,
– Too strict parents,
– Perfectionist parents,
– Absent parents,
– Competitive (comparing children with siblings and others, or pushing them too much),
– Far away parents,
– Abusive parents,
– Legalistic parents,
– Critical parents,
– Judgmental parents,

All these things can bring harm and wounds, and carry great amount of weight to spoil children. We need to see our children and other children as the Almighty God sees them, highly precious, highly valuable, deeply loved and concerned, and that’s simply wisdom.

You don’t need to be an Army Captain to your children, what they need from you is your friendship, your presence, your time, and your servanthood. Be a friend to them.

You don’t need to be an Army Captain to your children, what they need from you is a family, give your time, spend your time with them, be a friend.

And the most important thing in a family is the environment of love.

SPEND MUCH TIME WITH YOUR CHILDREN, your time with them will give them emotional health which will protect them from many evil temptations.

Give attentions to them, which means getting interested in what they are interested, playing games with them, listening to them, just being with them, going to restaurant with them, listen to their joy and sadness without being judged, make friendship with them.

Some emotional needs of children:

Below are some of the emotional needs of your children, in fact every human beings on earth need them, but more needed by children and young one’s –

– Attention (knowing what they doing, being interested in what they interested, playing games with them)
– Acceptance
– Respect
– Healthy Affections
– Friendship
– Your Presence
– Support
– Security
– Provision
– Approval
– Praise, praise, praise
– Appreciations
– Encouragement
– Comfort

Value your children, they are precious, they are worthy, they are valuable, build healthy confidence in them by providing these emotional needs to them.

Many children are spoiled because of unmet emotional needs, while many other children are spoiled because of abuses, both active and passive abuses. Giving more praise is healthy for them, being critical and judgemental to them can spoil children, they need your love and grace, and your presence.

Love your children,
David Chawngthu


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